Proposal for New REST Methods

Composed on the 21st of March in the year 2015, at 4:06 PM. It was Saturday.

(Okay, okay, okay, they're technically HTTP methods for use with RESTful

services. It was late. I was tired. Stop writing to me.)

PLEASE

Move previous request ahead in queue by one position.

ICANT

End session and delete account.

WTF

Send email to system administrator reminding them to update the documentation.

GRRM

Delete a major, user-friendly application at random. Returns no explanation.

APPLE

Returns what you should have wanted, regardless of request parameters.

MICROSOFT

Returns what you asked for, but response is irrelevant to your project by the time it arrives. You will have to use it anyway.

PUTIN

Like PUT, but also transfers target domain to the sender's name servers.

BOREDNOW

Returns estimated time until the system tells you why your previous request failed.

NORRIS

Cancel all other processes and execute arbitrary code as root.

LEE

Cancel a NORRIS request.

INIGO

Find orphaned processes and delete user accounts responsible for them. Returns satisfaction.

SUP

Returns brah.

When I'm rich, I'm going to have a Yin-Yang bowling ball made, then I'm going to learn how to bowl and every time I get a strike I'm going to shout 'BALANCE THAT MOTHERFUCKER!'


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